Three people this past month asked me to write a blog on jealousy. I am really glad they asked because it is a very important topic. Jealousy is an emotion that will hold you back from happiness.
If you are in a situation where negative emotions arise, remember that it is OK to have the reaction that comes naturally, i.e. getting defensive, getting angry, or getting jealous. It is hard to stop an emotional response from rising up out of your subconscious. It becomes problematic, however, when we let those negative emotions remain in our waking consciousness to fester.
You are perfectly aware that negative emotions are no good for you. I am confident that you know this because negative emotions do not feel good. What you may not understand yet is that you have the power to change your outlook. You can change your mood simply by deciding to.
In yoga, we say to live your life from a place of love. Love is more than just an emotion; it is a state of mind. In fact, the nature of living a loving life is your true nature, or your true Self. In yoga, we call the true Self the Atman. Atman is divine, pure loving consciousness. We connect with Atman when we hug someone we love, or feel warmth in our hearts at something that makes us happy. To read more on this topic, please visit this link.
Take a moment right now and think of a time when you felt nothing else but love. You should be smiling to yourself when you remember that moment. You are also likely to feel warmth in your heart over this memory. That feeling is your true Self shining through. That feeling, that connection to Atman, is what we should strive to feel as often as possible.
Now, when negative emotions arise, please do not get upset at yourself. Instead, stop yourself and acknowledge that you do not like the way you feel. If the negative emotion you are feeling is jealousy, make up your mind to be happy for the person you are jealous over. Imagine how good you would feel if those wonderful things were happening to you. When you imagine yourself having those things that you desire, you should feel that warmth in your heart again. From that place of love, try feeling truly happy for the person who possesses what you covet.
It is imperative to love what you want, and not be jealous or angry because you do not have it. If you let negative emotions rule your psyche, your life will feel miserable. Alternatively, when you feel love for things that you want, even if you do not posses them, life feels uplifting, sensational and empowering. The Buddha said “All that we are is the result of what we have thought”. Jesus said “It is done unto you as you believe”.
With those two quotes in mind, what life will you decide to make for yourself? If all that we are is a result of our thoughts and if we receive as we believe, as two of the greatest religious leaders said, then what are your thoughts bringing into your life? Well, the answer lies in your state of mind. If you are miserable, then your thoughts are bringing you more things to be miserable over. If you are happy, then your thoughts are bringing you things to feel happiness over.
Decide now to be happy and loving as much as you possibly can all day, everyday. It is completely within your power. No one is going to make that choice for you. You are the only person who can decide for yourself to live your life from a place of love.
My love to you,
“Have only love in your heart for others. The more you see the good in them, the more you will establish good in yourself.” ~Paramahansa Yogananda